#Quotes by jack handy archive

#Quotes by jack handy archive

OL1901763W Origin-contact Origin-note Physical items are owned or controlled by and digitized by Internet Archive Origin-organization Internet Archive Page-progression lr Pages 102 Ppi 514 Related-external-id urn:isbn:0751517054

If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid seeing yourself in.

Identifier deepthoughts00hand Identifier-ark ark:/13960/t08w4837s Isbn 0425133656ĩ780425133651 Ocr_converted abbyy-to-hocr 1.1.20 Ocr_module_version 0.0.17 Openlibrary_edition Jack Handey Sayings and Quotes Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That's because my dad always refused to let us look at the family's financial records.Access-restricted-item true Addeddate 18:22:20 Boxid IA116411 Boxid_2 CH104801 Camera Canon EOS 5D Mark II City New York Curatenote shipped Donor I guess we were kinda poor when we were kids, but we didn't know it.See more ideas about jack handy quotes, quotes, jack. Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. Explore Devin Heideckes board 'Jack handy quotes', followed by 139 people on Pinterest. Deeper Thoughts: All New, All Crispy (1993), Hachette Books, ISBN 1-56282-840-1 36 Jack Handey Quotes - Inspirational Quotes at QuotationFun Jack Handey Quotes Whenever you read a good book, it's like the Literature is right there, in the room, talking to you, which is why I don't like to read good books.Basically, it's made up of two separate words - 'mank' and 'ind.' What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind. MAYBE in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself. DEEP THOUGHTS by Jack Handey If they ever come up with a swashbuckling School, I think one of the courses should be Laughing, Then Jumping Off Something.It may just mean that you have a lot to learn about proper hammer maintenance. IF YOU GO through a lot of hammers each month, I don't think it necessarily means you're a hard worker.That way, if anybody says, 'Hey, can you give me a hand?' you can say, 'Sorry, got these sacks.' A national bestselling collection of comedian Jack Handey’s Deep Thoughtsshort, funny observations on life that were shown in between sketches on Saturday Night Live. Not screaming in terror, like the passengers in his car. TO ME, it's a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. Jack Handey means when he dies, he hopes to die the way his grandfather died ,peaefully in his sleep.Deeper Thoughts : All New, All Crispy (1993), Hachette Books, ISBN 1-56282-840-1.IF YOU ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because man, they're gone.tags: calmly, die, screaming, will-rogers. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car. It takes a small man to cry, but it takes a smaller man to laugh at that man. () When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep.If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is 'God is crying.' And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is 'Probably because of something you did.'.And I can picture us attacking that world because they'd never expect it. I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate.Deep Thoughts: Inspiration for the Uninspired (1992), Berkley Books, ISBN 5-6.If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.Deep Thoughts were first seen in small comedy magazine Army Man Comics edited by George Meyer and continued in National Lampoon in 1984 though gained popularity when they were read on Saturday Night Live beginning in 1991. Top 5 quotes from Jack Handey 'If you ever crawl inside an old hollow log and go to sleep, and while youre in there some guys come and seal up both ends and then put it on a truck and take it to another city, boy, I dont know what to tell you. He is most famous for his Deep Thoughts, a large corpus of surrealistic one-liner jokes. Jack Handey (born 25 February 1949) is an American humorist. If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because man, they're gone. I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. You see, in my view a writer is a writer not because he writes well and easily, because he has amazing talent, because everything he does is golden.